Chapter 8 - I Spy

gun While on vacation in Canada, he successfully negotiated with a group of terrorists who had seized a small bakery. He has performed several covert operations with the CIA. Neither the laws of physics nor gravity apply to him.

Occasionally, he treads water for three days in a row. Using only a hoe and a large glass of water, he once single-handedly defended a small village in the Amazon Basin from a horde of ferocious army ants and later trained the ants to perform in a circus.

During a brief stint with the Australian secret service, where he teamed up with an assistant called only "Joey," he set an all-time record on the conumption of lager beer.

Anchor He has walked the extra mile in the other fellow's shoes (they hurt) and swum across the Atlantic in pursuit of a traitorous spy. Using only the breaststroke. While blindfolded. And while towing an anchor.

Sleeping He sleeps once a week; and when he does, he sleeps in his favorite chair.

basketball player The women of America have sung his praises since he recommended that all spy and detective stories on television be replaced with sports. Doing so has kept thousands of husbands occupied and out from under foot.

TV w/sports

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